photo by james barros
J de Salvo's stories, poems, and articles have been published extensively in print and online. He is the editor and publisher of the Pedestrian Press and the journals the Bicycle Review and Oakland Review. A native of Los Angeles, he resides in Oakland, CA.
KFC Pink Bucket
"It's not that I don't get what you're saying, but Pink? The last thing I picture when I think about Kentucky is the color Pink. We've got an image to maintain, here."
"True enough. Listen, I know you're of the Old School. To you, the Red and White Stripes are inviolate, and kind of a banner, even, under which you've fought many a battle, but just hear me out.
So far as Image is concerned, what's our number one downside?"
"I don't know... health, I suppose.":
"Eureka. Specifically Cancer and Heart Problems. Nothing much we can do about the Heart Problems."
"No...I suppose not...
...But! ...We can't be held responsible for people who choose to constantly overindulge."
"Quite so. And I couldn't agree more. But stay with me. The thing that's really true genius about the Pink Bucket is that, what's the one kind of cancer no one can link us to?"
...I hadn't thought of that. Think again. It's a big one. As big or bigger than lung."
"It's the point of the whole campaign, excuse me, proposed campaign...
...the Pink Bucket campaign?"
"Oh, yes. Breast, yes."
"Yes, the breast. Bite into a breast of KFC, and help fight Breast Cancer!
If it were Colon, say, we'd look like a bunch of hypocrites, but you can't lose with breast."
"Huh...no, I should say not..."
J de Salvo