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My Burning Desire to be Young Again |
I sit at my computer
The burning is so out of control it makes my toes curl
My urethra is on fire
All medical websites kind of unanimously agree
They know what I got
And I’m pretty sure I know what I got, too
The burning is so intense
And I can’t focus on much writing
All I have the patience to do is mindlessly scroll Facebook
Somebody posted a video from YouTube
A song by Paul Simon
“You Can Call me Al”
I haven’t heard the song in a while
I play it
I’m immediately taken back
To better times
I’m pretty sure it was the early 90s
I was on vacation in New Hampshire
I was very young
My brother, sister, and cousins all piled into a minivan
One of my cousins had a mix-tape
And on this mix-tape there was the Paul Simon song
I wish I were that young kid again
On such a fun vacation
Route 93, going north
In Waterville Valley
Headed up to North Conway
Via the Kancamangus Highway
Riding around with my favorite people in the world
Paul Simon playing out of the tape deck
But here I am now in the present day
With a urethra on fire
What a character arc
To go from that kid in the minivan on an innocent vacation
To this 32-year-old man fucking women, drunk, without condoms
And paying a bad, filthy price for doing so
I wish I were back in that minivan
But all I can do is listen to the Paul Simon song
Over and over again
And pretend I’m there
It’s better than nothing, I guess
It somehow
Temporarily
Lifts me out of my body
Takes me back in time
And removes me from the incredibly uncomfortable present
This painful present
All thanks to my burning urethra
I just want to be young again
I don’t want to have sex
I don’t want to know what sex is
I want to just be a kid
And not have a penis that’s on fire
copyright 2014
Matt
Burns |
