Thoughts in the Blue Hour
(Golden shovel based on a line from "The Colossus" by Sylvia Plath)
Awake in the too-early hour where time lengthens, I
try to change a bullying 'should' to a positive 'shall'
as if getting up is something I choose to do but it never
is. I must stop lying here, there's too much to get
done. I need to stumble together a morning, put you
out of my mind, focus entirely on what's been put
on my to do list. Fake it, pretend it wasn't hashed together,
ignore that my heart still skips beats, won't return to me entirely.